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Category Archives: Zombie Advice
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Ask a Zombie: Sunflower Saves the Day Edition
Sunny day, my friends (that’s “hello” in flowerese). Zombie went on vacation. But cheer up: I’m here to answer your questions, and I just know we’ll all have a wonderful time! Love, Sunflower _________________________________________________________ Dear Valued Customer, We are International …
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Ask a Zombie: The “Rick Steves Doesn’t Have a Monopoly on Travel Advice” Edition
Dear Zombie, I have terminated every single zombie you have been able to throw at me. Have zombies finally given up? It is a shame how pathetic zombies were to give up against me. (I am eleven.) Why don’t you …
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Ask a Zombie: “Speaking Truth to Flowers” Edition
Dear Zombie, Why do you hate Plants so much. Can’t you all just get along? How about nuts and the others? Any grudges? XOXO Lover not Hater Dear Not Hater, Zombie see you have bought into plant propaganda and Zombie …
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Ask a Zombie: “Everybody Loves Lutefisk” Edition
Dear Zombie, I’m looking for a job so I can live with my girlfriend in Norway, I come from England. Do you have any advice or tips that you could give us to make a good impression in an interview? …
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Ask a Zombie: The Joseph A. Wapner Tribute Edition
Dear Zombie, I like being online and playing flash games. But I’m also into Pokemon. Should I spend more time playing my favorite flash game website or Pokemon? Pokemon Trainer Red PS. What is your favorite Pokemon? Dear Red, Who …
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Ask a Zombie: The “Increasingly Inscrutable” Edition
Dear Zombie, Which Zombie movie portrays Zombies in the best light? And which one do you enjoy the most? Signed Wondering Dear Wondering, Anything with Steve Buscemi. He is the zombie all zombies want to be. Classy and he look …
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Ask a Zombie: The “Couldn’t Think of an Edition Name” Edition
Dear Zombie, Moustache mode does not work in real life. I’ve tried and I’ve tried, day after day I look at myself in the mirror and no matter what (if I say moustache repeatedly or write it vigorously on notebook …
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Ask a Zombie: Questionable Typing Skills Edition
dear zombie, when do zombies like to hunt for brain, and do people ever run and scream when you are trying to steal their brains? -Jackson Dear Jackie-baby, Let Zombie answer your question with question: Why you not know how …
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Ask a Zombie: “What Is Wrong With People?” Edition
Dear Zombie: As a spontaneous gesture to my lovely wife, I got her the notebook and pen as you suggested. (See last time. -Zom. Ed.) I have a list now, but she pinned it to my head so I wouldn’t …
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Ask a Zombie, Centennial Edition
Before we begin, Zombie just want to point out – 100th Blog Post! Where is Zombie’s prize? Okay, onwerd. _______________________________________ Dear Zombie, My teenage son hates school and homework but he loves YOU and all your Zombie buddies. Call me …
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