Valentine’s Day the Video Game Way


Question: What video game character (any era, any system) would you want to spend Valentine’s Day with?

Here’s how the Blog Ride team answered:

A.J. pours it on:

If you know me well, you’ll know about my fondness for harem pants and pirates. As well as skull belt buckles, the canon of obscure-ish Mario characters, and syrup. So, it’s probably no surprise that my Valentine’s date pick is Captain Syrup. Sure, she’s a bit greedy, and a bit of a baddy big boss here and there, but if you want to be a female pirate captain, and rival of Wario, you can’t be all sweetness and light, pals (even if your ship is called The Sweet Stuff). And while she might not be a good choice for lifelong companionship (what pirate is?), I’ll bet she’s lots of fun and, like me, enjoys a good fruity tropical drink and singing pirate songs. All of which makes for a memorably awesome Valentine’s Day.

 

Rowland stays in-house:

I love Chuzzles. They are like little chirpy pillows of squiggly fun. They are just SOOOOOooo fluffy. Can  you really imagine taking Commander Shepard out on a date? Or Isaac Clarke? You. Would. Not. Survive. Nothing good could happen from this. Chuzzles on the other hand offer nothing but safe, reassuring, comforting love. And they always pick up the tab.

 

Dana swoons:

I play Ascension on my iPad every day, literally. It’s a deck-building game, so it’s all about acquiring powerful cards and slaying scary monsters. You start out with a basic deck of weak cards, but you use their combined strength to get better cards, and the better cards let you do cool stuff like slay the Sordid Asp or the Constricting Horror. Along the way, you find pretty powerful warriors you can add to your deck, like Prodigal, who can slay a monster costing 3 or less, or Arha Templar, who slays monsters costing 4 or less. And then there’s Aaron the Godslayer. He can slay any monster, regardless of cost.

Maybe it’s because I’ve lived in cities most of my life, but for me, one of the most attractive qualities a man can have is the ability to protect me in a dangerous situation. If I could choose any video game character to go on a date with, I’m picking the one who carries a gigantic sword! The one with the quiet look of confidence on his stoically handsome face.  The one who could quickly dispatch whatever monsters might appear.

The mechanics of a deck-building game also inspire some really unhealthy jealousy! If I can’t afford Aaron, I’m likely to banish him altogether to keep my opponent from getting him. That’s right, if I can’t have him, no one can! Sorry, Aaron, for all those times I’ve sent you to the Void. I hope you know I did it out of love. (And if I get my hands on the Serpentcall construct, I’ll totally come rescue you.)

Philip pounds his keyboard until words come out:

I love video games almost as much as I am bad at them. And where would we be without the first video game that I was bad at, Pong? Nowhere, that’s where. So for Valentine’s Day I choose to spend my time with my oldest friend in the industry, Paddle. Is it the left paddle or the right paddle? Does it matter? Maybe I’ll spend the day with both of them. No expectations. No entanglements. Just clean, simple up-down, black-white in a gray, uncertain world.

 

Tara gophers it… goes for it (puns are hard):

When I ask myself which video game character I’d like to spend a lovely Valentine’s Day with, there is no question in my mind that the fuzzy, smiley, hilarious, Big Fish Games gopher that graces the Fairway Solitaire game is the one for me. Gutsy McDivot’s sweet cheeks, mysterious smile, and those eyebrows! I just think he’s the cutest and funniest human-sized gopher around and wouldn’t mind getting to know him a little better this holiday. So… is it a date, McDivot?!

 

Julie wins (again) because she married a guy named Leroy Jenkins way before the name “Leeroy Jenkins” became a thing:

Leroy Jenkins.

The real one.

Duh!


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